July 01, 2022

Summer Fun at a Russian Prison


Summer Fun at a Russian Prison
Just you and your prison gang enjoying the sunshine and water. Laslovarga, Wikimedia Commons

Even as Russia invades Ukraine, there are some things that have stayed the same. For instance, Russian prison officials getting up to shenanigans.

A tender announcement posted on a website for public procurement specified a need for a "towed water banana." The institution requesting the watersports equipment was Penal Colony No. 7 in Meleuz, in the Russian republic of Bashkiria.

The posting details requirements, including that the banana must be able to sit six people and measure 3.9 meters × 2.4 meters × 0.75 meters (approx. 13 ft x 8 ft x 2.5 ft). The colony has also requested that the banana come with all necessary accessories, including a pump, case, a repair kit, and necessary documentation. All of this must not cost more than R 133,000, or $2,440.

July 12 is the deadline for delivery, so if you're looking to unload your watersports gear, now's your opportunity.

While we can't exactly picture guards and inmates frolicking on a sunny Russian beach, taking turns driving the boat and giggling on the inflatable, we assume that the "towed water banana" will at least be put to good use.

 

 

You Might Also Like

The Water is Fine: Water Sports in Russia
  • August 08, 2021

The Water is Fine: Water Sports in Russia

Russia isn't known for being a warm-water country, but during the summer months there are more than enough accessible rivers, lakes, seas, and oceans within and around the country to have a little fun.
Yes, Dumplings are Still Bribes
  • December 11, 2020

Yes, Dumplings are Still Bribes

A police chief in Novosibirsk has been convicted of corruption charges after accepting Caucasian dumplings as brides.
'Sup?
  • August 12, 2020

'Sup?

St. Petersburg saw over 2,000 attendees at its stand-up-paddleboard (SUP) festival this year, many in costume and with pets in tow.
Like this post? Get a weekly email digest + member-only deals

Some of Our Books

Bears in the Caviar

Bears in the Caviar

Bears in the Caviar is a hilarious and insightful memoir by a diplomat who was “present at the creation” of US-Soviet relations. Charles Thayer headed off to Russia in 1933, calculating that if he could just learn Russian and be on the spot when the US and USSR established relations, he could make himself indispensable and start a career in the foreign service. Remarkably, he pulled it of.
Russian Rules

Russian Rules

From the shores of the White Sea to Moscow and the Northern Caucasus, Russian Rules is a high-speed thriller based on actual events, terrifying possibilities, and some really stupid decisions.
How Russia Got That Way

How Russia Got That Way

A fast-paced crash course in Russian history, from Norsemen to Navalny, that explores the ways the Kremlin uses history to achieve its ends.
Murder at the Dacha

Murder at the Dacha

Senior Lieutenant Pavel Matyushkin has a problem. Several, actually. Not the least of them is the fact that a powerful Soviet boss has been murdered, and Matyushkin's surly commander has given him an unreasonably short time frame to close the case.
Murder and the Muse

Murder and the Muse

KGB Chief Andropov has tapped Matyushkin to solve a brazen jewel heist from Picasso’s wife at the posh Metropole Hotel. But when the case bleeds over into murder, machinations, and international intrigue, not everyone is eager to see where the clues might lead.
White Magic

White Magic

The thirteen tales in this volume – all written by Russian émigrés, writers who fled their native country in the early twentieth century – contain a fair dose of magic and mysticism, of terror and the supernatural. There are Petersburg revenants, grief-stricken avengers, Lithuanian vampires, flying skeletons, murders and duels, and even a ghostly Edgar Allen Poe.
Steppe / Степь (bilingual)

Steppe / Степь (bilingual)

This is the work that made Chekhov, launching his career as a writer and playwright of national and international renown. Retranslated and updated, this new bilingual edition is a super way to improve your Russian.
Moscow and Muscovites

Moscow and Muscovites

Vladimir Gilyarovsky's classic portrait of the Russian capital is one of Russians’ most beloved books. Yet it has never before been translated into English. Until now! It is a spectactular verbal pastiche: conversation, from gutter gibberish to the drawing room; oratory, from illiterates to aristocrats; prose, from boilerplate to Tolstoy; poetry, from earthy humor to Pushkin. 
Stargorod: A Novel in Many Voices

Stargorod: A Novel in Many Voices

Stargorod is a mid-sized provincial city that exists only in Russian metaphorical space. It has its roots in Gogol, and Ilf and Petrov, and is a place far from Moscow, but close to Russian hearts. It is a place of mystery and normality, of provincial innocence and Black Earth wisdom. Strange, inexplicable things happen in Stargorod. So do good things. And bad things. A lot like life everywhere, one might say. Only with a heavy dose of vodka, longing and mystery.
93 Untranslatable Russian Words

93 Untranslatable Russian Words

Every language has concepts, ideas, words and idioms that are nearly impossible to translate into another language. This book looks at nearly 100 such Russian words and offers paths to their understanding and translation by way of examples from literature and everyday life. Difficult to translate words and concepts are introduced with dictionary definitions, then elucidated with citations from literature, speech and prose, helping the student of Russian comprehend the word/concept in context.

About Us

Russian Life is a publication of a 30-year-young, award-winning publishing house that creates a bimonthly magazine, books, maps, and other products for Russophiles the world over.

Latest Posts

Our Contacts

Russian Life
73 Main Street, Suite 402
Montpelier VT 05602

802-223-4955