"I will transfer the amounts collected from the slanderers to an orphanage, I will publish a copy of the payment here."

– Head of Roscosmos Dmitry Rogozin, writing on his Facebook page that he would donate any proceeds from his suit against three news portals for slander

“A man caught the pillow. As it later turned out, it was the driver of the Tomskoe Pivo [Beer] enterprise, and he tried to hastily hide it in his car… The driver was detained.”

– A source in Tomsk region’s law enforcement on the latest developments in the arrest of the town’s mayor

"Today, this absurdity is the rule. Who told you that [a graduate] has not forgotten 95 percent of what he actually studied there?"

– Dmitry Peskov, suggesting the idea of instituting an expiration date for university diplomas

“In general, yes, winter is expected not to be cold. Winter is predicted in this color - I'm even afraid to pronounce the word – pink."

– Roman Vilfand, scientific director of Russia’s Hydrometeorological Center, on the colors that will appear this winter on meteorological maps (pink means temperatures higher than norms)

“Almost the entire first batch of iPhone 12 and iPhone 12 Pro was bought up over the weekend. A number of models with the most popular blue colors have already sold out. The highest demand was for the Pro version, with 70% of customers choosing it. New consignments of goods are expected in the near future.”

– Report by MTS, on the popularity of new iPhones in Russia, which sold out at MTS stores within three days

“Let's dance and hug a little less, and give less work to our healthcare system.”

– Yevgeny Yelin, vice-governor of St. Petersburg, on a recent proposal to close restaurants in the city at 11 PM.

“Compared to the crisis period, the share of people adhering to a savings policy in economic behavior has decreased: 68% of Russians believe that it is better to spend as little as possible, saving as much as possible for the future.”

– Results of a poll conducted by the Russian Public Opinion Center, on how Russians are saving and spending money

“Note: this is parody, using #deepfake technology (but the job is there, Donald).”

– Tweet from Kremlin-funded network RT, promoting an ad about its coverage of the US election

“You see, this is all the food industry. Unfortunately, the food industry is killing us on par with tobacco.”

– Doctor and TV presenter Alexander Myasnikov, on the common mistakes people make when they’re trying to eat right

“Just know that you don’t give away your loved one… Belarusians, we are a force.”

– a group of Belarusian and Russian pop singers, singing in a patriotic music video to support President Lukashenko

"McDonald's is expanding its geographic presence and plans to open the first factories in the Far Eastern Federal District in December 2020."

– Press announcement by McDonald’s, which plans to open its first restaurants in Russia’s Far East

“This is a special lightweight shoe, which is currently the lightest possible in the world, so that there is no additional load (when it is delivered to orbit).”

– Press release from Faradei shoe company, which recently developed a special shoe for astronauts