August 01, 2019

The Road to Nowhere


The Road to Nowhere
Oh the melon-choly the driver must feel! gbdd121 | Instagram

Quote of the Week

“We always stop cars with cut watermelons on the roof. As it turns out, not in vain.”

– Road police in Chuvashiya after catching a drunk driver

 

Green, Eggs, and Fans

DiCaprio as a Russian imperial general
DiCaprio? That won’t do. How about Dekaprov? / Ves_ulan_ude_ | Instagram

1. Russians are begging an environmental big fish, Leonardo DiCaprio, to save a lake. The actor has an entire foundation dedicated to fighting climate change, so Russians thought he might be able to divert attention for a moment to another environmental issue: Lake Baikal, which is under threat. In case that’s not enough justification, he has a Russian babushka. And blood is thicker than water, so… DiCaprio should pay attention to the world’s largest, deepest, and oldest body of fresh water. 

He hasn’t yet, but he did post on Instagram (with dozens of comments from thankful Russians) about the unprecedentedly large fires happening now across five regions of Siberia, destroying Russian forests, emitting greenhouse gases, and threatening the Arctic.

2. A former St. Petersburg official was convicted of letting himself be buttered up. Meaning, he accepted bribes from illegal street vendors in the form of not just cash, but also eggs and butter, and allegedly honey as well. For some reason, the official won’t admit to the honey, even though the $11 jar probably won’t make any difference in this sticky situation. He was fined over $10,000. This is clearly not the way to get to the Land of Milk Products and Honey

3. Ukrainians say there is a threatening green light shining on them from the Russian side of the Azov Sea, and President Zelensky’s military (cough, zeleny means green in both Ukrainian and Russian, albeit slightly different pronunciation and spelling) isn’t happy about it. Russians say that’s impossible, or perhaps an optical illusion. We Americans say it sounds a lot like an Eastern European (egro, opposite) version of The Great Gatsby

 

In Odder News

  • A man in St. Petersburg was sent to a mental hospital for trying to sell passports of the Kingdom of ASPI. Which doesn’t exist. 
  • Russia will have official roads made of ice and snow. Don’t salt these ones please. 
  • The mayor of a town in the Far East gave citizens buckets of paint as part of the campaign “colorful houses.” 
Colorful houses in the Far East
Lending color to a neighborhood, literally. / The Government of Amurskaya Oblast

 

Thanks to David Edwards for a story tip!

Want more where this comes from? Give your inbox the gift of TWERF, our Thursday newsletter on the quirkiest, obscurest, and Russianest of Russian happenings of the week.
 

Like this post? Get a weekly email digest + member-only deals

Some of Our Books

White Magic

White Magic

The thirteen tales in this volume – all written by Russian émigrés, writers who fled their native country in the early twentieth century – contain a fair dose of magic and mysticism, of terror and the supernatural. There are Petersburg revenants, grief-stricken avengers, Lithuanian vampires, flying skeletons, murders and duels, and even a ghostly Edgar Allen Poe.
The Little Humpbacked Horse

The Little Humpbacked Horse

A beloved Russian classic about a resourceful Russian peasant, Vanya, and his miracle-working horse, who together undergo various trials, exploits and adventures at the whim of a laughable tsar, told in rich, narrative poetry.
Bears in the Caviar

Bears in the Caviar

Bears in the Caviar is a hilarious and insightful memoir by a diplomat who was “present at the creation” of US-Soviet relations. Charles Thayer headed off to Russia in 1933, calculating that if he could just learn Russian and be on the spot when the US and USSR established relations, he could make himself indispensable and start a career in the foreign service. Remarkably, he pulled it of.
The Moscow Eccentric

The Moscow Eccentric

Advance reviewers are calling this new translation "a coup" and "a remarkable achievement." This rediscovered gem of a novel by one of Russia's finest writers explores some of the thorniest issues of the early twentieth century.
Fearful Majesty

Fearful Majesty

This acclaimed biography of one of Russia’s most important and tyrannical rulers is not only a rich, readable biography, it is also surprisingly timely, revealing how many of the issues Russia faces today have their roots in Ivan’s reign.
Life Stories: Original Fiction By Russian Authors

Life Stories: Original Fiction By Russian Authors

The Life Stories collection is a nice introduction to contemporary Russian fiction: many of the 19 authors featured here have won major Russian literary prizes and/or become bestsellers. These are life-affirming stories of love, family, hope, rebirth, mystery and imagination, masterfully translated by some of the best Russian-English translators working today. The selections reassert the power of Russian literature to affect readers of all cultures in profound and lasting ways. Best of all, 100% of the profits from the sale of this book are going to benefit Russian hospice—not-for-profit care for fellow human beings who are nearing the end of their own life stories.
22 Russian Crosswords

22 Russian Crosswords

Test your knowledge of the Russian language, Russian history and society with these 22 challenging puzzles taken from the pages of Russian Life magazine. Most all the clues are in English, but you must fill in the answers in Russian. If you get stumped, of course all the puzzles have answers printed at the back of the book.
Jews in Service to the Tsar

Jews in Service to the Tsar

Benjamin Disraeli advised, “Read no history: nothing but biography, for that is life without theory.” With Jews in Service to the Tsar, Lev Berdnikov offers us 28 biographies spanning five centuries of Russian Jewish history, and each portrait opens a new window onto the history of Eastern Europe’s Jews, illuminating dark corners and challenging widely-held conceptions about the role of Jews in Russian history.
The Pet Hawk of the House of Abbas

The Pet Hawk of the House of Abbas

This exciting new trilogy by a Russian author – who has been compared to Orhan Pamuk and Umberto Eco – vividly recreates a lost world, yet its passions and characters are entirely relevant to the present day. Full of mystery, memorable characters, and non-stop adventure, The Pet Hawk of the House of Abbas is a must read for lovers of historical fiction and international thrillers.  

About Us

Russian Life is a publication of a 30-year-young, award-winning publishing house that creates a bimonthly magazine, books, maps, and other products for Russophiles the world over.

Latest Posts

Our Contacts

Russian Life
73 Main Street, Suite 402
Montpelier VT 05602

802-223-4955