The world’s biggest country, in a magazine. Since 1956.
Thursday, August 09, 2018
1. A pension fund office in Kaluga was bombed early Friday morning. The bombing followed the government’s unpopular decision to raise the pension age for both men and women, an act that has sparked protests across the country. Preliminary reports suggest that the blast was caused by standard ammunition, not a homemade explosive device. In true Russian spirit, the Kaluga pension fund office was still open for business on Friday.
2. A cat in the clink! One intrepid feline was found attempting to carry drugs (hashish and amphetamines) into a prison in the Tula region. To be fair to our maligned cat, police believe that two recent inmates of the prison used the cat to smuggle the drugs into the prison, and that it was not actually the cat’s idea. The theory is that the inmates put the drugs into a collar on the cat, which had also formerly lived at the prison. The cat was then supposed to return home, delivering the drugs to the prisoners. We hope that the cat will get a “get out of jail free” card, but it seems the culprits may not: they face up to 10 years in prison for their less than purrrfect crime.
3. One man in St. Petersburg has gone off the rails. Or rather, the rails have gone off thanks to him. Police detained a man who reportedly stole 275 metric tons of train track rails over the past month. A local news website estimated that this much track is worth 5 million rubles ($79,000). So which will come first, this man’s life turning into a train wreck or an actual train wreck? Only time will tell.
One reporter recently unearthed this gem of a municipal services video, which features a bear showing off some hip hop
The Orthodox Church is officially against the eating of brains: a zombie walk was cancelled due to religious concerns
Check out this 3D augmented-reality map of St. Petersburg, replete with models of famous monuments
“The woebegone mechanic dismantled more than 275 metric tons of metal products with a wrench and a crowbar”
— St. Petersburg transport police
Want more where this comes from? Give your inbox the gift of TWERF, our Thursday newsletter on the quirkiest, obscurest, and Russianest of Russian happenings of the week.
Adults want kids to vote, kids want Leonardo DiCaprio to soak himself, and Leo wants fewer video games on TV.
Nukes get names, a truck becomes a camera, and an old church gets a fresh look.
World Cup picks, elections, and fraudulent activity all point to the same lesson this week: make your choices wisely.
TWERF takes on the political this week, bringing you news of the election and the weird things that accompanied it.
Grudinin shaves the ‘stache, the other election results are in, and New Zealand struggles to offend Russia.
In honor of April Fool’s Day, we present you with jokes, mishaps, and fun times all around.
Stories about chocolate and fish: not an appetizing pairing, but a good selection for this week’s TWERF.
Learn about the animal spies among us, get tips on how to survive nuclear war, and watch a world record get broken.